Classes for Humans

Here, the latest entry in the blog of Mystical Marjie. Written in response to emails that are currently circulating.
Copyright (c) 2006 by Marjorie B. Harrison. Feel free to forward around the world without a fee, as long as the copyright notice is attached and the text is not altered in any way.

UNIVERSAL UNIVERSITY
motto: Agape et Lux (Love and Light)
Founded Eons Ago

announces its course line-up for the current millenium

Basic Human Dignity 101: How to Feed, Clothe, and Provide Medical Care for Every Human on the Planet
.
An Extra Intensive Seminar on How Not to Whine About Taxes will be required for anyone who tends to whine about how much this will personally cost them.

NOTE: Lab Course will meet every week on a seven-day cycle. For five days of the cycle, Participants will be required to embed themselves in an underfunded district and personally meet and interview, and provide services for 700 people. The other two days will require working in a shelter or kitchen on one day, and providing intake interviews for medical care on the other.

This course will meet every day for a lifetime.

SPECIAL NOTE: This course WILL BE required for graduation, and, even if it is the only course taken, will guarantee that a diploma will be conferred. Fulfills all requirements for a concentration in Basic Humanity.
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Back by Need: Men and Women Cooperating Together without Sniping.
Men and Women will meet twice a week together, and once a week with members of their own gender. Each week, consensus will have to be reached on a topic of interest to only ONE of the gender groups. The people of the other gender will learn active listening skills (how to reflect back that you've actually heard what was said) and active silence skills (knowing when to keep quiet) Topics will be chosen at random from a list generated by each gender. In the course meeting with only one gender, each group will have to discuss the opposite sex without resorting to sarcasm, put-downs, generalizations, belittling, or jokes.

Note: If you don't pass this course the first time you take it, you are required to re-take it after spending one semester LIVING 24-7 as the other gender.

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Coming Next Semester:

Building a Society that is Humane

This is a more theoretical course provided by popular demand. Participants will be required to design, from the ground up, a cooperative community where the goal is the common good of all. Design of co- housing, food cooperatives, sustainable farming, renewable energy sources, and educational delivery systems will be encouraged. Participants will be graded on their final design by a panel of ordinary citizens.

ALSO OFFERRED For the Advanced Student:
My God is the Same God as Your God.
Participants will be asked to interview, live with, and worship with people from fifteen other faith-based groups. The final exam will be a test of 1) knowledge about the traditions and beliefs of those faiths, and

2) an in-depth report on the similarities of the Deity as seen through each faith.
Extra Credit will be given to those who contact the Divine Source directly through prayer, meditation, or other contemplative or active practice, and who are able to quote that Source based on their own interaction with Him/Her/It.

A Panel of Experts will grade participants. Experts will change each semester, but may include Jesus, Mohammed, Mary, Mother Theresa, Abraham, Isaiah, Shiva, Krishna, Buddha, Kwan Yin, Mother Earth, Great Spirit, Zeus, Athena, etc.

Coming Soon (we hope)

Living in a Society that Values Peace. This course is still under construction, but the Administration is aware of the demand.

Topics include: Proportion of the annual budget that is spent on warfare vs. Humane services, How to Invest in Peace-promoting Funds, Rewarding Members of Society for Peaceful Actions, Finding Peace in Your Own Heart So That You Can Be an Instrument of Peace.

Participants will be required to complete the following actions while maintaining a peaceful attitude:

• Listening to a politician whose policies you do not support;
• Driving in rush hour;
• Getting through the Express Check-out Line behind someone with more than the maximum allowed items without saying anything either out loud OR under your breath (advanced participants will be asked to perform this action without even thinking anything ill of the person)
• Parenting from infancy to teens
• Watching real-life depictions of violence against other people without wanting to retaliate.

Universal University offers all these courses for Free to anyone with a human genome. Contact your Higher Self to apply.